Understanding and Managing Separation Anxiety (sepanx) in Dubai

Living in Dubai can bring unique challenges, including the common issue of separation anxiety in children. This article explores the definition of separation anxiety, its causes, and practical solutions for parents dealing with this concern. The transient nature of expatriate life in Dubai adds another layer to the separation anxiety puzzle. Families frequently move in and out of the city, leading to a cycle of farewells and new beginnings. This constant flux can impact children's attachment patterns, influencing the way separation anxiety manifests in different phases of their lives.

Coping with Separation Anxiety: A Parent's Guide in Dubai

Saying goodbye can be challenging for both parents and children. As adults, we've developed coping mechanisms over the years. However, as parents, we may find ourselves grappling with the re-emergence of the symbiotic bond inherent in the parent-infant relationship. Separation anxiety in children aged 9 months to 4 years is normal, but unresolved parental separation struggles can complicate a child's development.

Why do healthy children feel separation anxiety?

Most parents, especially mothers, struggle to leave their babies for extended periods. This emotional challenge is rooted in biology, as infants are not designed to be separated from their primary caregivers. The parent-infant relationship is a symbiotic system, particularly crucial in the first year of a baby's life. However, the reluctance to frustrate a child, a common trait in Millennial and Gen Z parenting, may contribute to more developmental issues.

It is vital to understand that in terms of attachment, too little and too much give the same result - developmental challenges. You have to imagine you are walking on a tightrope; the answer to healthy parenting is a delicate balance. An attachment issue will be manifested in children in two ways, either through a child that is withdrawn, not communicating openly, and appearing as if they don't need anything from their caregivers. Or as a child who is over-emotional and showing separation anxiety. 

What does separation anxiety look like? 

In a psychologically well-adjusted young child with a secure maternal or caregiver bond, observable behavioral patterns emerge when the mother initiates departure, such as heading to work or taking the child to daycare. This sequence is characterized by three distinct phases: protest, despair, and detachment.

During the protest phase, the child exhibits expressive reactions, including loud crying, vocal requests for the mother, physical gestures such as throwing themselves around, manifestations of anger, and rejection of others. Alternatively, the child may display a desperate clinging behavior to the available caregiver. In this initial phase, the child anticipates the mother's return, which ideally occurs within a few hours to a week.

However, certain situations or circumstances (such as traveling for work) may necessitate the progression to the second phase—despair. This phase typically manifests during prolonged separations extending beyond approximately a week. In the despair stage, the child may experience a sense of hopelessness and exhibit physical inactivity. Monotonous crying, withdrawal from surroundings, and a state akin to deep mourning characterize this phase.

The third and final phase is detachment, wherein the child appears to have recuperated. They accept care, food, toys, and interaction from others, even demonstrating sociability and smiling. Interestingly, if the mother returns during this phase, the child may initially ignore her and withhold the usual expressions of affection. Prolonged continuation of separation in this phase can lead to potential irreversible consequences. The child may become superficially attached to surrounding adults, resulting in a diminished significance of human contact.

Trap One - Your Child is Too Detached 

If a child appears too detached, it's essential to question emotional availability and warmth. Emotional neglect can be detrimental to a child's psychological development. Seeking therapy and ensuring emotional connection are crucial for fostering a healthy parent-child relationship.

Trap Two - Excessive Separation Anxiety in Dubai

Conversely, an overprotective parenting style can lead to increased separation anxiety. Constant attention and reluctance to leave a child alone might result in excessive clinging. This parenting style, though well-intentioned, can hinder a child's development. Recognizing the delicate balance between attention and independence is crucial.

When to Seek Professional Assistance for Sepanx in Dubai

Recognizing when a child's separation anxiety is beyond the usual range is vital. Typically, this might occur when a child reaches the second and third stages of separation anxiety as described above. Seeking professional help is advisable for extreme cases. Committing to a treatment process involving both the child and parent can prevent severe disturbances. If sadness or anxiety becomes overwhelming, reaching out for assistance is essential.

Assistance at for sepanx at Thrive Wellbeing Centre in Dubai

For residents in Dubai experiencing severe separation anxiety, Thrive Wellbeing Centre offers assistance. Maša Karleuša Valkanou, a systemic family psychotherapist, specializes in working with both adults and children facing separation anxiety challenges.Dubai's fast-paced lifestyle often involves demanding work schedules and social engagements. These factors can contribute to separation anxiety triggers, affecting both parents and children. Exploring the lifestyle-related aspects that may intensify separation anxiety provides a holistic view of the challenges faced by families in Dubai.